December 14, 1959

Dear Milton,
You really gave the Bergen County Medical Society a thing or two to think about. The Valley Hospital next morning sounded like the trees outside our window on a spring morning – all atwitter.
“If anyone had told me I’d sit glued to one of those uncomfortable chairs for two hours that passed like a few minutes I’d have said they were crazy!”
“I thought at first he was faking, but when I saw the responses of the different subjects I thought there mush be something to it.”
“You goofed when you missed that meeting.”
“A certain group- and you know who – are quite upset and going to write a letter to be published in the Bulletin”.
“That was really worthwhile.”
The subjects have been most interested in the questions that were asked them and very honest in their answers. A great many questions have been asked me and I’ve done my best to answer what I knew and suggest further study.
Joyce reported that when you asked her if she’d like to draw a picture she didn’t really want to at the moment. She was looking in my direction and noticed my head shaking as if to say “No”. She felt
confused and upset and nervous. At first I couldn’t recall but it suddenly came to me clearly that Mr. Fincke had been trying to manipulate the big blackboard around for her to write on in actuality and I was trying to signal him not to bother. A case of too many cooks. Sorry. I didn’t mean to spoil the broth.
The reaction to the meeting was enthusiastic and favorable. The only ones I know of who were disturbed were the psychiatrists. Only three of them were there that I know of. These were much interested. It seems to be the State Committee on Mental Health who were miffed because the program was not cleared through them. As a matter of fact, it never occurred to any of us. We don’t clear a program on Obstetrics through the Maternal Welfare Committee – nor any other field – why this? Their letter in the Bulletin will afford opportunity for an answer and stir up still further interest. I think they’re awash right now in the sea of interest.
So please accept the sincere thanks and appreciation of the Society for your efforts and know that they are bearing fruit. And please accept my own special thanks for coming. It was so good to see you
and to hear you and to get better acquainted with you. So much went on in the period of your visit. Thanks for being still and allowing me to become aware of so many things. For instance, Alex and
Jeanibeth feel compelled to keep up continuous conversation to cloak their feelings and thoughts. Tod resorts to silence, sometimes glum, sometimes just pleasant quiet. It was utterly delightful to have
someone around who knows how to be still in the midst of it. Somehow it gave me a chance to become an observer from an angle different from my usual one. I learned so much. It’s so fascinating how a friend contributes so much by his very presence as well as by what he says and does. In revealing himself to me he also reveals me to myself – and I change in response. I’ve known that before, of
course, but I was made newly aware of it – and charmed by it. I loved your visit.
I had hoped to get out to Garden City but could get on coverage for long enough. I took Friday off to attend the New Youk Postgraduate Assembly of Anesthesiologists. Milton Marmer was the speaker at one of the Round Tables at lunch. The afternoon was a panel on hypnosis. Betcher, Marner, conn, and Crasilneck spoke. You probably have a pretty good idea of what they’d say. I came away with the impression of having been presented with half a glass of water – one that was half empty. I feel better when presented with ennables me to carry on until I can find another half a glass. It’s good to be able to see and hear the people whose writings you see. It helps evaluate better. I’m very glad I was steered into the Seminar on Hypnosis in the beginning. It’s sort of like the difference between the administration of oxygen, perhaps. When it’s mixed with helium the pressure relationships are altered so that it goes through obstructed passages easier and so is more effective. Thanks for the lift.
There was so much excitement over the Tuesday meeting that the check was not made out though an amount was set aside for you in the budget. It’ll be along soon. We’re sorry it didn’t get to you directly. It will help toward defraying your expenses and be a token of our appreciation. – And speaking of excitement – I had thought Dr. Reich, the Chairmen of the Program Committee was going to introduce you. I was startled when Dr. Hull called on me. Mr. Fincke had warned me but I hadn’t really believed him for Dr. Reich was so enthusiastic about the program – and he likes to make speeches and had said nothing to me about it. It must have been a serious emergency to keep him away. It’s water under the bridge now. I should have gotten you to pseudo-orient me to the future before the meeting! Looking back I can think of so many things I might have said!

Happy holiday season to you and your family.
Yours in agape,